Tuesday, October 28, 2008

A Day In The Life Of A Royal Seamstress



'Tis a taxing job being the royal seamstress. All day long, and into the night, have I been stitching, so that my royal clients will not be left with nary a stitch of finery, in which to disport themselves, on the Eve of All Hallows.

Away in the Kingdom Of The North, six year old S was offered options by Papa, as they perused together the great pictorial tome "Simplicity Patterns."

A clown, may hap?

Or a witch, perhaps?

Upon seeing pictures of typical witchy garb however, S recoiled in suitable six year old horror!

Such a dearth of glisten and glitter,

paucity of pinks and purples,

total absence of baubles and bangles!

And the nose.....What dark arts would be required to transform her delectable button nose to that of a withered hag? And her golden tresses to the greasy, lank hanks of a crone?

The royal girl-child goes about, most days, disguised in the humble threads of a peasant child. But All Hallows Eve is a time to let her true colours show. How to decide?? Glinda,the Good Witch [a misnomer for sure---she looks like a cross between a fairy and a princess]---or, a No-Holds-Barred Princess?

Somewhere in the middle, S decided. Size 6.



Princesses should never go about without a Knight in attendance. Everyone knows that. Or should. Small brother D, undecided on what manner of get-up to request for himself for All Hallows Eve, was quickly recruited to be a Knight. Requiring shining armor. And a helmet. Size 4. Oy!

And that was all the information given to the royal seamstress.

Said personage betook herself, forthwith, to the local Cloth Merchant, famous throughout the land for the beauty and richness of his wares.

And tottered home, laden with yard goods, and commenced to sew. This humble peasant woman, can, of a normal day, be found toiling at her treadle machine to provide bed covers for all the royal beds, and tapestries to hang on the castle walls, the better to keep winter's chill from the royal bottoms. Nor does she toil alone, in this, the season of All Hallows. All across the land, sewing machines are humming. Why, even the bold and intrepid Lily, who, truth be known, prefers the click of knitting needles, has taken seasonal employment as seamstress-in-waiting to Han Solo and his band of Storm Troopers. Last I heard, [this may be but a wild and unfounded rumour,] she was reportedly sewing party duds for Chewy himself!

Accustomed as our heroine is to working with fine silks and rich brocades, she nevertheless had difficulties, pricking her poor peasant fingers with the blasted needle, numerous times, and muttering imprecations under her breath. But, in the end, perseverance triumphed. She hustled her buxom bustle to yon royal Post Office in hopes that the Royal Mail Coach would speedily carry her earnest efforts to the Kingdom of the North. So that she might find favour with the Pink and Purple Princess, who will sally forth, resplendent, on All Hallows' E'en, attended by her Trusty Knight, bedecked, as befits a Trusty Knight, in gold plated, metallic [grrr!] armor.

Otherwise, she might spend the rest of her days languishing in a dungeon......

Note; Pictures added later to appease the peasants......

8 comments:

Ali Honey said...

Doth sound like you did well as Royal Seamstress. Will there be portraits for us commoners to view after All hallows?

( see you found something to write about....in quite a different hand )

Jess said...

GIANT HINT - I hope Lily will post pictures!

molly said...

Lily's pictures will be of Han Solo [or maybe it's Luke Skywalker---when you get to be my age you easily confuse the two!] The Princess and her Shining Knight will be at the mercy of the King, my son, who, alas, doesn't have the best track record on sending me pictures. I took one of the pink confection, sans Princess, but forgot to take a pic of the knightly attire, such was my haste to put it on the royal mail coach......

Kacey said...

I had such fun making Halloween costumes when the kids were little and # one daughter took over where I left off with her brood. I made matching clown suits, a black Falcon (hubby worked for Ford), Raggedity Ann abd Andy and even H.R. Puffinstuff. That one was accomplished with chickenwire and papier mache.... the head was the size of a medicine ball. People used to invite them into their homes and take pictures of their outfits. I don't know who had more fun....the kids or me!

Stomper Girl said...

And what was the Royal Photographer doing when all these fine outfits were being finished off? did you not take even one of the costumes laid out on the royal bed-brocades?

Tanya Brown said...

Pictures! The peasants demand pictures!

molly said...

What? Are my colourful words not enough? I will try, but the peasants will be disappointed! Better they should use their imaginations....However,I am but a poor peasant woman myself....And will do as I am bidden....

heartinsanfrancisco said...

The muttering of imprecations usually works for me, and also the cavernous, yawning dungeon with accommodations for one.

You are a true heroine! Prithee provide pictures of the darling damsel and her errant knight in full garb, I pray thee.