Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Maria

A golden half moon was still high in the navy blue sky when I tip-toed from the house. The OC had left at 5 a.m. to take Lily to the airport, back to her boys. But there were sons and grandchildren still sleeping within. I'd tried, but sleep would not come back, so, off to the trees with me to quiet the internal din.

I hugged my sweater 'round me in the damp and chilly air and walked. The birds were waking up, alerting sleepyheads to the arrival of a new day. As I walked, the sky was quickly paling from navy to ever-lighter blue. The first few arrows of sunlight shot between the pines.

The moon still hung in the remnants of the night, and I wondered.

"Is she watching from way up there?"

Can she see her children, how their hearts are breaking? Can she, from so far away, comfort them, when no one else can?

Now that she is finally free, can she watch over the man she married sixty four years ago? Protect him from himself, from his anger at the world, from his bitterness? Console him when he seems inconsolable? He seemed, all those years, to be the strong one. But now, in the cold light of dawn, I realize he was not.

Maria was the rock, the strength, the heart of her family. She just let him think it was him.

And now she's gone.

May she rest in peace.

21 comments:

J Cosmo Newbery said...

Ow. Sympathies from afar.

StitchinByTheLake said...

My heart hurts for you. blessings, marlene

Ali Honey said...

RIP Maria.
Thinking of you all, as you learn to be without her, but remember all the times you had together, good and bad.
Hugs Molly my friend, from Ali.

Stomper Girl said...

Thinking of you all.

Warty Mammal said...

May she rest in peace. Bless you for being a comfort to her during your marriage and during her final days.

peppermintpatcher said...

So sorry to hear of the loss of such a strong woman.

jkhenson said...

Hugs and prayers, Molly, and much sympathy.

sMC said...

she will be remembered fondly.
The final winter is always the hardest especially loved ones left behind. hugs Molly

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

You have given us all a sense of Maria. God bless.

Thimbleanna said...

Oh Molly. You're such a beautiful writer. You've made me pause in my hurry of the evening with big tears in my eyes. Maria must have been very please to have you for a DIL. May she rest in peace. I pull that sweater a little tighter around you and send my hugs.

Eastcoastdweller said...

What a poignant and profound eulogy You have written. Be at peace, as She surely is.

Kacey said...

One of my favorite hymns says,
"Turn your eyes upon Jesus,'
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of this world,
Will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace".
When a person has no more strength to give to the living, they gain acceptance of the final time and slip off to be with the Lord, where we are promised new bodies that will never hurt again. Only those who remain have pain, but God wipes away every tear from your mother-in-law's eye. Your hands will be full with Dad now that Mom is not here. Best wishes for the strength to endure.

Isabelle said...

Oh, Molly. How lovely for a MIL to be so cherished by her DIL. Life is too short.

Sooziii said...

Molly enjoy all those wonderful memories you have of her .... she won't be far away.

meggie said...

Heartfelt condolences, Molly, to you & yours. Most of all, to hers.

ganching said...

Sorry for your trouble.

Wanderlust Scarlett said...

Wow.

Immeasureable love and light to you, and peace that washes over your soul.

~HUGS~


Scarlett & Viaggiatore

heartinsanfrancisco said...

I'm so very sorry, Molly.

Maria sounds like a lovely lady in every way. Perhaps even she didn't realize how strong she was.

Your relationship with her was closer than many women enjoy with their own mothers, and I know that you were always a great blessing to her. If she is looking down, she is smiling with joy to have known you so well and for so long.

persiflage said...

My sympathy. How wonderful that you had each other.

silfert said...

Hugs and prayers for all of you. Treasure your memories.

elena jane said...

beautiful tribute....rip dear maria!