Friday, January 14, 2011

random, random, random

 


Want to write. Can't write. Stuff in head too hot to handle. Glad the old year is gone, let him go! let him go! Don't let the door hit him in the donkey. Is it safe to be optimistic? Is it safe to answer the phone? Is it safe to get out of bed?Is it safe to hope the new year will be  better? Or are we on a roll here? Will it bring more of the same? In which case I'll just go back to bed now.......That pious piffle about writing for its own sake? Hogwash! I write for the connection. Lonesome for the comments. Standing on the corner, hat on the ground, sign in hand: "Will write for comments!" My Pollyanna persona has taken a beating. I'm in danger of becoming a pessimist.

Just as I am sinking into the morass, a friend sends me a 40 point Guide to living in 2011.

# 8: Sit in silence for at least ten minutes each day. So I did. Talk about Miss Fidget! At least five times in the first ten minutes I thought of something I needed to get up and urgently do, right now, and then I remembered, and sat back down, and closed my eyes and breathed slowly until my timer went off. The second day was easier. Concentrate on breathing. Ten minutes goes by so fast. It's easy to spare them to do this. And it muffles the noises in my head!

#10: Walk outside for 10-30 minutes each day. It's been cold here. No snow, no sleet, no ice, but, by our usual standards, frigid! Tempting to huddle indoors, pour another cup of tea and wait it out. But once you bundle up and venture forth into the anemic sunshine, and listen to the birds twittering [or could that be their teeth chattering?}it's not so bad, and before you know it you've circled the garden twice and are heading towards the 30 minute mark and you have to run inside to get the camera, because, though mostly things are brown and brittle, there are cheerful berries, and creamy rosettes defying the brownness.



Part two of # 10 was---"And while you walk, smile."


So, maybe there is room in this new year for guarded optimism. I'll raise my [Irish Cream-laced] cup of cocoa to that!

24 comments:

dianne said...

optimist or pessimist - half full or half empty - i'm happy to raise my cuppa (irish coffee, heavy on the irish) and say sláinte! as i stand in the median with my cardboard sign "will read for posts!"

i've missed you!

aubirdwoman said...

now you know my cuppa ... full and overflowing. No room for pessimisium (its too difficult to spell)
Happy New Year Molly come on it has to get better .. sometime. hugs s

aubirdwoman said...

btw I missed you too. :)

Ali Honey said...

Hi Molly. I too missed hearing from you. I hoped 2011 would be a big improvemnent on 2010, but so far it is not proving so. WE are okay but our neighbors across the ditch are having a hell of a time of it. Floods, floods and more floods and on the other coast fires.
Here we are so busy we are just nose to the grindstone so to speak.
I even worked on kiwifruit this afternoon so not even my weekends are my own. Never mind hard work is good for ones fitness ( or at least I hope it is. ) WE have nothing to complain about seeing other folk having all their possesions and some homes totally ruined.( good reason not to own too much new flash stuff. )
What have you been cooking? Sewing? Reading ?
Haha the word verification wants me to type "covent." I typed convent by mistake.

Relatively Retiring said...

Smiling to yourself while walking would cause some raised eyebrows and interested speculation in this community.
I hope things get better for you soon, Molly.

persiflage said...

I hope you are ok, and that you can keep writing, and smiling. I am having trouble writing too, as there are too many things I am angry and unhappy about, and when it comes out I don't like myself or what I produce.
What a beautiful camellia - enough to evoke a smile and enjoyment of beauty.

Molly said...

Dianne---there are so many unfortunate people standing out there with their signs these days I should be counting my blessings.
"Slainte!" to you too....How did you get the "fada" over the "A?"

Happy New Year to you too Birdy!

Ali- You are always so positive, and you are right. I think events like the shooting in Arizona, and the disastrous situation in Queensland put our personal problems into perspective....and what's the percentage in moaning anyway? [Or having a "pity party," as one who reads my blog put it. That stung enough to dry up the ink for a while, but Pollyanna usually wins out in the end!] I'm glad you endure the occasional moan and keep coming back!
And yes! One certainly wonders what it would have been like to take THAT route!
On the sewing front---trying to focus on finishing rather than starting....

RR---I can smile safely hereabouts! No-one to take note that the old girl has lost it but the woodpeckers and the squirrels!

Persi--you have put it better than I could, but yes! I just don't like what comes out when I'm angry and unhappy and don't think anyone else would like it either, hence the silence. Here's to positive thoughts!

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

That sitting in silence for 20 minutes rule wasn't written by a Glaswegian , then ?
A change of scene , even a brief stroll , is restorative . The camera always makes interesting things leap out at one , too . A winning combination !
I hope this new year is full of good things for us all , and for you in particular .

lgsquirrel said...

Say, a squirrel I know says he's seen you walking around the garden with a goofy smile.

Sorry to hear that 2010 has been a bad year. I certainly hope you will have a much better 2011. I always think f you as a beach girl. I am sure a walk on the beach would also be good medicine.

Isabelle said...

Ah, you're back! Sorry that you've been sad. Hope you become less so.

Walking twice round the garden takes 30 minutes? Are you the Queen of Florida? Can I have an acre or two of your garden? Walking round mine twice wouldn't take 3 minutes...

Pauline said...

It pays to pop in on you and Rise now and then :) We can all do with an occasional rant. It helps to put it out there sometimes. As a friend told me, there's no reason to be discouraged about being discouraged...

Hope the rest of 2011 excels :)

riseoutofme said...

Sounds good ... smiling inanely and goofing around the garden ... I'll have some ..yes please.

jkhenson said...

I missed you, Molly! :) Hopefully 2011 is more pleasant to you! :)) Many hugs, smiles, and cuppas! :)

StitchinByTheLake said...

I've missed seeing you here. Please come more often. :) blessings, marlene

dianne said...

(for the squiggle) i used my mantra - copy paste, copy paste, copy paste ... and maybe SOMEDAY i will learn how to do it myself!

i dunno - standing with a cardboard sign seems to have worked for the man with the golden voice, so it might work for us, too ... we just have to have high hopes, right?

my word verification is blyzjou - i think that might be "bless you" in some foreign tongue

Molly said...

S&S----You need to explain about that Glaswegian reference. It went right over my head! Here's to good things all around!

LGS---I did, in fact, use your medicine recently [a walk on the beach.] Best medicine known to man[or beach girl.] Something about all that water, all that sand, all that brisk, bracing air.....

Isabelle---When I'm in the garden I rarely walk in a straight line. I take more of a zig-zagging, meandering path, zig to check out the blueberry patch, zag to inspect the blackberries, zig and zag in and out of the bamboo.....But since you are a curious person,I walked at a moderate pace all around the perimeter and it took me five minutes--no detours. No queens living here!

Pauline---your friend sounds like a sensible person!

Oh Rise! It will be looking so much nicer by the time you visit!

Jen---It is surprising how much you come to view blog friends as real friends!

Marlene---In case you don't have enough red work to do I'll have some you'll like by and by....

Dianne---that or "Bless you" combined with a sneeze!

Thimbleanna said...

If you write, we will comment! It's wonderful to see you back. I'm sorry 2010 wasn't pleasant -- I hope 2011 will be much more fun. And happy. And just all around wonderful!

Fran said...

I too like to get outside for half an hour a day, although that's a heck of a long time to be leaning out of my bedroom window, I have to say, and I get a crick in my neck.

Thanks for visiting my blog!

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

Re the Glaswegian reference : You've never been there , I take it . We , as a whole , can't shut up ! Think Billy Connolly on speed ..... then think of a whole bus full of Billy Connollys on speed ......

The Lass said...

Oh, I've missed you and your writing! I am very much hoping you'll be back more frequently now - happy or sad, I'll take it!

Friko said...

No posts, no comments. Easy, see?

Lots of things to get out of bed for, you know, and they don't all come out of a bottle with a fancy label either.

Get out there, walk yourself into a better frame of mine. I have to, why shouldn't you. Life's not really fair and nobody said it was.

I take my black dog with me when I walk the black dog. One of them I usually lose.

SoulDragon said...

Hi Molly
Have just "discovered" your wonderful blog. As I read it and all the associated comments, I find that much of the musing and observation is so much like me at the moment.

Sounds like your experiences in 2010 may have been oh so similar to my own! (confess to reading between the lines!) Forced through sickness to be home and away from society since August last year,have more than enough time to re-assess, contemplate, think etc...curious as we get older that so many things appear in a new light, and/or we find ourselves more emotional in dealing with them.
Hope this year is much better for you and that we can tea drink together across the miles....:)
Regards
Kathleen

Molly said...

Anna---Too much drama is bad for the brain....I just want to be a dotty old lady and not have crap setting my teeth on edge all the time! I want to sit and stitch, and natter with friends, and jump [albeit a tad arthritically] in puddles, and be a person who makes other people [and myself] happy....Is that so much to ask? Thanks for the Rah, Rah!

Fran---That's a novel way to "go outside" for a while every day.....You crack me up!

S&S---Gee! There I was, thinking WE had the market cornered on non-stop blathering.....Maybe its Celts in general?

Lassie---Speaking of Celts and blathering, what happens when you cross a German [taciturn type] with a Scot [Billy Connolly on speed---Have no idea who he is but I get what Smitonius means]??

Friko---Crack that whip Friko! You are right of course! I am not ill. Perfectly healthy, thank God. It's feeling I need to worry on behalf of people I love that's making me crazy....I hate feeling powerless to help. But I've been scolding that black-hearted cur and making him stay in his corner....

Souldragon---It's always lovely to make a new friend...Welcome to the funny farm.

Stomper Girl said...

Hello Molly. I thought I should wish you peace of mind for this brand new year, and hope your ten minutes of stillness and 30 minutes of fresh air are helping you achieve this. Cx