Sunday, July 24, 2011

Fair And Balanced........

I am a little bit ashamed of my last post. Unworthy of the person I want to be, of the example I want to give my children and others. How many hundreds of times did I say to my children "If you have nothing good to say, say nothing at all!" I know that there are better ways to cope. He and I will never be soul mates, but life has thrown us together, so I'll be trying to keep to the high road instead of the seedy alleys of bitterness and resentment. If I should ever write a novel though, I'll be drawing heavily on him for my villain!
 

Meanwhile, in the interests of fair and balanced reporting..............
He has had a really interesting life. His family was a prominent one in his small, east European hometown, where, for many years, his father was the mayor. He became accustomed early in life to special treatment. His mother's pride and joy, as a young fellow he would not drink milk if Maruschka, the servant girl, had milked the cow, only if his mother had. My mother-in-law, may she rest in peace, always called me Maruschka.....Hmmm!

During the War he was plucked from in front of a firing squad, moments before he was due to be shot, when a high ranking officer, walking by, recognized him as a fellow countryman.

He had several other very narrow escapes, balanced by a good portion of both good luck and ingenuity.

He is fluent in a whole string of European languages;

He found ways to survive and put food on the table when all the odds were against him;

His children were always fed and decently clothed and given to understand that they'd better work hard in school...... Or else.

He helped many friends and acquaintances get to this country, after he was established here, by agreeing to be their sponsor.

He introduced us, but regretted it when we decided to get married as, in his opinion, the entire Irish race were a crowd of rowdy drunks.

He almost didn't come to our wedding when I dug in my heels and insisted it be in Ireland..... 

But then moved heaven and earth to get me and my toddler home when my own Dad was dying and time was running out.

He was tall and handsome [and vain as a peacock.] Still the nattiest dresser in town, and a fine looking man for his age......As he will be the first to point out to you [in case you didn't notice.]

How'm I doing? Fair and balanced, with just a few wobbly bits? That rebel Irish brat inside me keeps leaking out through the cracks. I'm doing my best though, to shove her back in.....and point her up the hill to the high road.


11 comments:

Anonymous said...

You did a good job here. But then again, I love your Irish "bratiness". Is that a word?

secret agent woman said...

Ah, well. I try to mostly stay positive, too, but every once in a while a vent is in order. At least I hope so, since I just did yesterday.

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

You can appreciate the good qualities without actually liking the person who has them .
He sounds rather like my late FIL . A man who didn't ever envisage not being the center of his family's life . Who kicked up an appalling fuss every time a child left home , let alone married . Who couldn't get old .
But the time when he shook his walking stick in my face because I wouldn't follow the Party line was when I had to put my foot down . And no , he never did warm to me , or I to him .
But when the family is fondly remembering his resourcefulness when Belgium was under German occupation I can see , and admire the man he was for them .

dianne said...

it is your wobbly bits that make you so doggone loveable, Molly...

Thimbleanna said...

Well Done Miss Molly! I've often wondered why some people age gracefully and are so pleasant to be around and others fight it all the way to the end. I can't help but feel really sorry for the mean ones -- it seems that fear has them in it's clutches.

Pauline said...

My mother always admonished me when I berated someone else, saying others deserved our respect (not necessarily our love, though) merely because they managed to still be alive! One might not know the whole story so one ought to leave a toe in the door for the benefit of the doubt to creep in. She was speaking from experience - one of her own grandparents seemed a tyrant but behind the ferocity lay a number of WWI heroics and horrors. I'd say you balanced your rant and rave nicely. Point that brat to the high road but allow her to step off the path now and then - we're supposed to be individuals!

Kacey said...

Yes, you are indeed fair and balanced....worthy of being on FOX News! But, back to your f-i-l...I suppose he is entitled to a bit of braggadocio, since he does have many accomplishments. But, nothing is worse than someone who thinks he is king of the dunghill, when he is simply full of it.

persiflage said...

You sound pretty fair and balanced to me, and giving vent to frustration and anger certainly helps restore a true perspective. Overall he does not sound like a person I would warm to, though. Too much sense of entitlement for my tastes.
I barrack for the Irish, myself!

Stomper Girl said...

Good on you Molly. Whenever I'm thinking critically about someone (which to my shame is rather a lot) I keep reminding myself of the wise saying "walk a mile in my shoes". Helps me keep a balanced perspective, even if I know my criticisms are entirely correct and justified!

Meggie said...

My goodness Molly, you did such a brilliant job, with this post!

molly said...

Just for the record, the phrase "fair and balanced" came to me out of the sky. In no way am I a fan of Fox News! Perish the thought!